Sister: I just got off the phone with Mom.
Me: Oh, and?
Sister: She crazy.
Me: What now?
Sister: Well, she was REALLY excited. She bought a pair of Rag & Bone shoes at Barneys on sale.
Me: Uh, really?
Sister: She claims they are 6-inch stilettos. Which I take to mean...
Me: Kitten heels.
Cliff's Notes Version of 13-Year-Old Girl's Diary...
Transcribed tidbits. Oh the pain of ambiguity. Jan 1 1998 I have a boyfriend his name is Garren Jan 4 1998 Thinking about breaking up with Garren. Saw Titanic for the 3rd time today. Jan 17 1998 I wish Garren would go back out with me. I think he still likes me. He crashed into a ski gate so now he has crutches. Feb 14 1998 Garron* hates me. I can’t believe he sent roses...